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Month: January 2016

Concerned

Is it that I am concerned about something? Is someone else concerned about something? It’s such a huge concern! I guess I am concerned about all the concerns about me and all those who are concerned about me! Why can’t people just stop caring and being concerned! It’s so much to handle, especially for someone who has little concern about oneself! I’m suffocated by all the care and compassion! Almost making me feel like I am dying in some time now!
Can people fake concern? I know quite a lot who can fake almost anything. So maybe this is also possible. But honestly, I don’t think it’s faking. And that adds to my concern! Yesterday when I wrote about people poking nose into others’ business, I had some specific people in mind. And today when I talk about care and concern, it’s more or less the same set of people in my mind! Maybe I am so disturbed about it that I want to shoo people away! Or maybe, I think it’s pointless to lament about things you have no control of! Or maybe, it’s just that the concern suddenly makes me insecure! When did I start confessing about my insecurities!
That evening when I was getting out of office on my two wheeler, he insisted I turn the headlights on. It was not dark yet, but he insisted, as I might not notice it on the way. Who was he? A security guard, paid by the company, definitely NOT for ensuring if I turn my lights on or off! Why did he care to say that then? I don’t remember seeing him before that or after that. Why didn’t he be there this evening also! Why couldn’t have he been concerned about my headlights again! This is probably why I like to shoo people away from care and concerns. It’s pretty much addictive! You get so obsessed that you can’t live devoid of it! Callousness is the concern!

How much is too less?

The other day, I had a conversation with a friend of mine, who was cursed by the One Plus One wrath (no offense to the die-hard fans, but they didn’t live upto the expectations set!). He was desperate to get rid of it and when Flipkart offered a decent ‘8k exchange policy’, he gladly grabbed it, and is now living a happily ever after (hopefully!) with his Moto X Style. Hardly an year since its purchase? I guess. Definitely not more than an year, and for 22k spent, its just 8k that has been returned! So, where did the 14k vanish? Let me stop you right there, before you smirk at me inside your brains and before you spill that ‘wonderful wisdom’, that it’s a mobile phone lady! A used one, at that! And the price just drops as you blink! Whoa, stop right there, again. Because, I can see it as much as you can.
Let’s look at something else now. I had another conversation with another friend of mine. This guy was pretty unperturbed by the old kid’s bicycle that rusts by the backyard, of his otherwise well kept house. When asked, he said there’s hardly anything that he would gain monetarily by disposing it, and hence he chose to keep it. Turns out that, a neighbour was interested in the cycle, wanted it for a relative living elsewhere. Of course, there was no talk about money, and the cycle is soon to depart to some other rusty corner. He added, it was bought for 4.5k (or was it 2.5k? I remember being around when it was bought) but it would hardly fall under Rs.500 worth of scrap.
After the two conversations, one thought that’s bothering me is, ‘How much is too less?’. While one person thought hardly an year of usage of the phone is worth the 14k, why isn’t the other satisfied with the 4k worth experience with the bicycle? Doesn’t your experience with a product adds to the worth of it? Why doesn’t the priceless moments with the bicycle count? On the other hand, why is that money’s value diminishing on contrast with its worth? Where do we draw the line on our spending? Well, I don’t have a final line of thought or a concluding note to this. I am as confused as I was. How much, exactly, is too less?

The woman of my life

The glitter in her eyes,
And the glow of her face,
The frail frame that she is.
As she escapes into thin space,
Leaving me with the life she chose.
A life she chose for me,
And the warmth she filled,
And the tears she shed,
For a life she chose for me.
Numb and dead, smiles that fade,
I see her go, go away from me,
And the life she chose for me.

Welcome 2016!

After a long break, back here, wanting to embrace more in life! Welcome 2016!
Smile a bit broader,
Laugh a bit louder,
Love a bit warmer,
Live life a bit slower!
Let the year be wonderful to you and me and everyone else!