‘Theory’ in practice!

For an average TVM-ite, second hand books point to just one place! And there again, if you are a student, you are sure to have atleast one ‘memorable’ bargaining episode with the street vendors at Palayam! Nothing equals the ‘fun’ of hanging out with friends at Palayam, walking in and out of every stall there, bargaining and befriending and at (some rare) times, yelling at the book ‘chettan’, and finally returning home (mostly) empty handed coz only that particular book that you were looking for went out of stock!

But, looks like its been time to redefine ‘fun’ book experience at Palayam! The one stop destination for the ‘bookies’ of Trivandrum…here it has come at Palayam. Placed inside Saphalyam Complex, ‘Theory’ doesn’t seem to compete with our street book ‘chettanmar’! Here,the concept is not just buy/sell second hand books. More than that, the ambience is what gets highlighted when you visit the place. The black and white setting and the ever smiling care-taker lady will just make you stay a bit longer than what you planned. Lingering around books, like you have nowhere else to go! (Okay, now that might suit only total crazy people like me!) ‘Theory’ lifts the perspective to another level of social commitment with free medical camps for financially backward people (free monthly check up for members too!) and liberal approach to book references! (If you don’t have enough money to buy the book, never mind, sit down at their luxurious chair and note down all that you need!) There’s more to say about ‘Theory’! It’s like putting down all the ‘theories’ about an ideal book store/library/recreation into practice! So much to experience than to describe!

If none of these takes you there for a visit, then mind you. Don’t go there for their free WiFi connection or for the free coffee refill!

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Dreams in Prussian Blue!

So I hear, the book “Dreams in Prussian Blue” by Paritosh Uttam is filmed as the latest Malayalam release, “Artist”. The book was a pleasure to read – very intense emotions conveyed in simple terms. Filming it was out of the question, from a reader’s perspective. But considering it was Shyamaprasad behind the screen, the same man from “Rithu”, (Forget the commercial success, the movie had a natural flow of life!), it is imaginable to see the book illustrated on the big screen. And lately did I notice that I have turned into a Fahad Fasil fan, owing to all of his movies’ impact! What’s so special about his movies? And there comes the obvious! Every single movie of his, that I have seen, speaks about nothing but betrayal. “Chappa Kurishu”, “22fk”, “Diamond Necklace”, “Friday”, “Red Wine” and on and on and now “Artist”! Even in cameo appearances, he has always been associated with ‘betraying’ story lines, as in “Cocktail” or “Indian Rupee”!

I doubt if this is even an interesting piece of information. But if atleast half the movies from my list above were a success in theaters, its solely coz of the relativity that people see in the movie, identifying with their on life. The extramarital affair, the rape, the gluttony, the robbery, the corruption, the lobbying – all forms of betrayal! The life around, the people amongst, the world outside, the soul inside. Until the book, it was a black. Everything about betrayal was black. But now, after the book, after so many movies on ‘betrayal’, I assume betrayal is colourful. As bright and as affluent as the charm of the vicious life around our esse.

Prussian Blue. Because, Blue is the colour of loneliness. Blue is the colour of sorrow. Blue. The colour of betrayal. And standing at that point, from where there’s no turning back. From where, there’s no falling back to things. From where, all we are left with, is to move on and accept things. And from that point, all we see is the rainbow – the brilliant shades of betrayal.

Innisai!

Music has always been this ‘thing’ to me, though I hardly sing or relate to anything musical about it. But I am still a music fanatic! I liked music all the way but the sudden passion rised in me ever since I drifted into Tamil music. Innisai! That TV programme in Kairali WE channel is what so much boosted my liking and passion for Tamil, and music in general. Back then, it was during my high school, that I got so engrossed into this awesome stream of music, and the programme was anchored by a bearded guy who talked a lot about Tamil music, authoritatively. I loved him for he said all the good things about music, and appreciated the same lines of the song as I did, and related to the same notion about each song and singer. It was a time where I had no other access to songs other than TV. Away from cousins and Malayali/Tamilian friends, with no internet, my only source was at 4pm every Fridays. And the compromises I had to comply with my little sister, to get that time slot with TV!

Over time, things have changed. A lot about music. A lot about the sources to new songs. I no longer watch Sun Music for latest Tamil songs. There was a time I used to wait for them to stop their lecture and play the song. But now, when everything’s just a click away, I am missing more than what I did long back. I have no clue about latest releases, let alone songs/singers/lyricists/composers! And things hit me real hard yesterday in the theatre when I realised what I’ve been missing all the way. Such a famous movie, such famous composers. And yet I hadn’t bothered to click on a download link. What all awesome music might have I already missed in this pointless rush of the moribund routine! If not for the movie, I would have just never heard this song that I so fell in love with. Already heard it a hundred times, in less than a day’s time!

Soon back with a bunch of songs that touched, changed and ruled my life, from the past!

Viswaroopam!

I go for movies with expectations. Some reviews. Some comments. Some story line. With some idea and knowing what to expect in there. But this time, I had none. I didn’t even want to go for a movie. But surprisingly, dad showed interest and no one wants to back off! So we went for Viswaroopam, the latest Kamal Haasan’s controversial Tamil endeavour. Even waiting for the ticket at the theatre, I hadn’t any thoughts about movies running in mind. May be that’s all the reason I was so mesmerised by what was in store for me, as in the movie.

The story line is pretty famous, now that the movie’s contributing to a lot of controversies. The Al-Qaeda Jihadis. The American vengence. Tit for tat. Terrorism. Osama and Bush. And all stories that get entailed with these references. The movie was unique, even when the theme is so overly filmed, exploiting patriotic sentiments. The movie stands out in the very detailing of the plot, filming things that most of might have only read in books, or not even books! The judging of the movie, its morale, and the idea it conveyed, are all serious topics to be discussed seriously. Not entering into the details, the movie offers a fantastic movie experience, exclusively by the quality in the making and rendering of it. The Sankar-Ehasan-Loy music score made two and half hours all the more pleasing. Every frame was shot so perfect, and each dialogue timed so effortless. It was totally worth being the first movie of 2013 to me!

Mom said I am abnormal for commenting that the movie was awesome. Little sister was nudging me all the while, until I finally promised to explain the plot once we get the out of the cinema. Dad couldn’t hear half the dialogues. Thanks to the theatre’s stupid sound system. I don’t think much of the viewers understood the movie as a whole. The language,and the style of filming are all contributors to the lack of reach. For someone who doesn’t get a bit of Tamil, English and situtional interpretation of dialogues, the movie would pretty much be lot of violence and stunt and incomprehensible humor. But trust me, there’s much more to the movie and the whole experience of it. Howsoever may it be to the generalia, the opening Kathak piece gotta make you spellbound, gripped to your seat! Unnai kaanathu naaningu naanillaye… Viswaroopathin ‘viswaroopam’ is to be acknowledged with an enlightened sense of acceptance to goodness and marvels in things!

The 22fk movie!

After long, saw a movie. And perhaps the right movie to see. Twenty two, Female, Kottayam. The title was promising. So was the whole movie experience. This cant be seen as a movie review. Dont set your expectations high.

We decided to go in a group. Cousins and friends and friends of friends. But finally at the eve of going, I could see my cousin’s little cousin missing. The reason that I got really took me aback! The movie wasn’t “suitable” for a girl of her age it seemed! I grew nervous and sweating, wondering if I’m finally all set for an adult movie. What would I tell my parents? Is this what my friends advocated for? I couldn’t find answers for any of those. Then came a more disturbing question. Wasn’t that girl just two years younger than me? And nobody thinks it is inappropriate for me. She had a brother to stop her from it. Nobody actually bothers with me? Well, that should have been rejoicing for me. It’s that sense of freedom that I always ever wanted. But yet, the question was as disturbing as it initially was. I couldn’t let go of my insecurity.

The movie began. We were late but had reserved seats. So the only difficult part was walking through the aisle in the dark, without tripping. (The most scary part of cinemas, actually!) Settling down at my seat, I didn’t know what to expect. I was prepared for anything and everything. Everything was smooth and running. I rationalised that it cant be an adult movie. It wasn’t to be on show. Ofcourse, there’s a censorship. I was relaxing. Intermission. I was at peace. Not about the movie. But about the initial disturbing questions. I had answers to all of them.

The movie was inappropriate for the girl not because of its sexuality. Censorship cannot be exercised over the inappropriate content either. There wasn’t anything explicit. It’s the theme what shouldn’t be exposed to “kunju manassu”(innocent minds, quoting her). Betrayal and it’s effects are what should be kept away from a child’s innocence. Not sex or sensuality.

Are you a mentally stable and normal person? Or do you scream in the public road? Do you yell out of desperation?
Do you find it difficult to distinguish between pain and no pain? The movie is a normality test. If you can manage to retain as much peace of mind, after the movie, as you had before the movie, then you are probably a very normal person. But any exception might imply otherwise. Lol. I’m not scaring anyone. But reality doesn’t seem far from it.

The fear of being violated. The gripping insecurity. The irreplaceable trust despite the betrayal. The willingness to forget and move on but never forgive. Nobody would define these as normal. And btw normal people could never define abnormality. Vice versa holds too!

Traffic – a review

A very very delayed reviewing of the movie Traffic. My inability to stay updated with every other movie playing in the cinemas should be kindly excused. I dont go out for movies alone yet. Nor do I beg my parents. So well, reviewing gets delayed. However though, I saw “Traffic”, going to the cinemas. 😛

Writing about it has been there in my mind ever since. For the urge to be strong enough to push me into writing this took so long! So now what actually pushes me into writing this is silly. A casual quick read of today’s chronicle gave me a glimpse of a self development feature, penned by Anupam Kher. He was vaguely talking about how life is a Domino effect. Or atleast, that’s what I vaguely deciphered from the write up, at a glance. Just as you get up, the first thing that happens to you is the trigger of the entire chain of events of the day. People call it by omen, lucky charm, divine signs and what not. The decision that you make this precise moment is totally dependent on the immediate previous moment of your life. And it continues, as if traversing through a reverse Domino effect. One after the other, perfectly cascaded and aligned. Thus happens life. A shouting at B. B throwing C out of job. C breaking up with D. D committing suicide in front of E. Enlightened E apologising to F. Fmaking friends with A. And back to A, B, C and D. Well, after putting this down, I guess I’m not cent percent correct with this theory of mine. It doesn’t feel wrong yet. 🙂

This stream of thought is awesomely conveyed through the movie. Every scene feels so related to the previous sequence of events. The story line crosses many lives and the connectedness is spread across all characters. Overall, you might miss consecutive connectedness. The relativity of the dialogues and the scenes are taken to a level so subtle that you dig into the movie to identify with them.

Like many our lives, unrelated instances create commotion and change the very course of the plot. Unable to identify with the strange relativity and subtle line of connectivity, people often fight back the swirl and drown themselves. Seldom do we realise, drifting along with the current is a much easier way to unravel the eerie ties of dependence!

Ah! The butterfly effect!

A morning with you!

So what do you get of the title? That I had a wonderful awesome date with some ‘you’? Or just a pleasant calm day with somebody special? Lol. Its none. Its just a morning with ‘u’. Or simply, mourning! What am I mourning though? I dont know. Do you actually need a reason? Well, I do. I should have reasons. For anything and everything. Coz I’m rational beyond any rationale! Irrational rationalist! Sounds cool? Or weird? Or disgusting? I dont know. But I know how it feels. Just slightly better than crap and that’s it.

Why the heck am I still holding on to something that makes me feel like crap? Coz somebody occasionally compliments me. About how bold I am to have the guts to face things as they are? How reasons and parameters dont frighten me? No way! The compliment doesn’t complement the shit feel. Despite them, my reasons and rational thoughts, by themselves be the reason for my existence. At a moment like this, feeling like the entire world is closing upon me, if I can still write, I owe something to my rational brain.

Nonchalance. No way near solace. But yet, it gives me a feel of triumph. Victory over myself. The feel of having the reins back again in your hands. I’m beginning to savour this moment. Of nonchalance. Of peace. Of solitude.

Got a set of three books last month. Voraciously read and finished the last book today. Its strange. Just so strange that I’m like this. Finding meaning to everything and symbolising everything to something. But trust me this was different. I wasn’t merely symbolising with the book. I could relate. Perfectly. To every single line of it. I thought I’d write a biography before I die. Atleast a personal diary which will be let public after my death. But not anymore. After this book, I just dont have anything more to write. Its all said. Straight and precise.

If there’s one thing you’d like to do for me, please dont read the book. (if at all if you get to know the book title by ANY chance.) Dont ever. But I really want someone to read the author’s note. Or do I? May be not. 🙂

Revolution 2020 in mind!

This is not a book a review. Not quite that kinda person who’d sit back and judge. But yeah, some things come innate. Like annoying symbolisms and intentional pricks. Symbolism is one thing that hugely did wonders to my life. The book is just another instance. I’m not gonna brief the story and spoil the fun. Its worth a read. (A second read takes a bit more of me!)

Is it so difficult to change something? So painstaking to fight back? Does it always feel like the whole world is on a mission against you? I guess it does. Or even worse. And the worst is yet to come! People are stupid. They say to fight back. Stop to turn and look at the beast’s eyes. As if your stare can freak out the thing that’s chasing you down. Trust me nothing works. None of them. Not running away from the crisis is not an option. Running away is not an option either. Does that mean you have no choice to make?

Exactly my point! You dont have a choice to make. You dont get to decide whether to run or to stay. Any effort of thought renders delayed solutions and worsened situations. And that’s where most of us screw up. Brilliantly! Trust your instincts and nothing else. Nobody is as right and as wise as you are! For nobody else actually is so keen in solving your curry in the ass problem!

Fighting back against all odds isn’t bad. Not wrong. Its just a bit tough. But worth the difficulty. Or is it? Coz if you lose, you are stuck with the beast again. And worst yet, if you win, you dont even have a beast to fight back in life? So what say? Is there actually a choice to make? 😛

The pursuit of happiness

Nay. Not a review of the movie. Partially coz I’m not good at judging things. But mostly coz I haven’t seen that movie yet! Now is that bad? Well, never mind.

Not bad that I haven’t seen the movie. But kinda bad I’m not here with a movie review. That’s what I should be better doing. Book reviews, objective writing, versatile poems, short stories, novelas. That’s where my pen (or the stylus or the finger) should be gliding over. Gently moving through the language, its marvels, and charm. But look at me! Lol. What am I doing here? Scribbling incomprehensible never ending boring essays. Exactly. The kinda essays you’d miserably want to skip in those old history texts. Well, doesn’t that kinda mean I should end this with a period? Lol. Not actually. You have a choice here. You can choose to read. Or choose otherwise. Nobody is stuffing it into your brains so that you pass a dreadful board exam! Its as simple as that. This my pursuit of happiness. So I write. No matter what the world says about how ruthlessly am I raping the beauty and lucidity of the language.

Label me Ms. Complicated. Talk behind my back. Mock at me. Does that even matter? I’ll keep writing. More complex. More subtle. More crap. Does that matter either? Lol.